I have a secret to share with you

Okay maybe it is only a secret if you have not heard this before.....we are all going to die!  Despite the thoughts of some who know me, I am not predicting the future again, merely stating a fact.  Sadly this a reality no matter how hard we try to outsmart it all, no matter how much plastic surgery we have nor how much money or power, or toys in our house or garage.  Another thing, no matter what we acquire in this life it doesn't mean beans afterward.  No matter what we do, no matter who we listen to our number will be up someday.

Yes, I once became disillusioned by the illusion and nearly let it get the best of me, in some ways maybe it did get the best.  My quest to 'climb the ladder," to capture fortune and power became almost consuming of me.  The thing about it, I was almost willing to take anyone down on my way up.  Not realizing it at the time, I lost a lot, of me and the people dear to me.  The more I had, the more I wanted.  

The things that people strive for almost their whole life and often times never achieve, I did.  A job of power, a six digit figure and all the toys and possessions a person could want.  Even with it all, I did not seem satisfied, it felt as if something was missing with it all.  Though life felt complete according to society, I had 'made' it to the top and only had up to go from there.  The climb up was not without its price and its sacrifices though.  At the time it all seemed worth it but in the end and now, I feel as if I wasted a lot of my life pursuing the wrong things.

At the time, I was in a position that I was good at, respected in and admired by some.  Even with all that I had, I was told there was more to be had and I wanted it.  The further I went and the more I earned and learned, it seemed the more I wanted, and needed to be happy, or I thought.   

 Every two weeks when it was pay day, I all ready had planned on what new toys to buy or clothes to add to my collection.   Yes, I was a great consumer and had every credit card imaginable to prove it!  That a closet full of clothes with designer and name brand labels.  Man, I thought I was on top of the world and never coming down. It was necessary for me to acquire, to show off my success!  My closets, my house, and my garage were full so surely my life must be as well.